Time

Time is a deity who embodies the properties of the indefinite continued progress of existence. He operates daily between the hours of 1:00 PM (13:00) and 6:00 DM (54:00) and is then temporarily succeeded by the Great Overlord Lionel in the times in-between.

As a concept, a full day on Earth is 60 hours due to the planet's orbit having been slowed down after an incident known as Timegate. Before this incident, a full day on Earth was 24 hours and encompassed two twelve-hour meridiems, these being the ante meridiem (AM) and post meridiem (PM). Now, there are five twelve-hour meridiems, these being the two aforementioned as well as the sero meridiem (SM), the fere meridiem (FM), and the deinde meridiem (DM). For a 60 hour period in the winter of 1980, Time fell asleep during a hangover from a wild party the previous night. When he awoke, the world was 36 hours behind schedule as he did not reset the meridiems at the end of the day, and forced the irreversible natural invention of three additional meridiems before the day was reset. This event became known as 'Timegate'.

Individually, Time is a lazy and unenthusiastic deity but does enjoy a good party. His friendship with Lionel aided his troubles after Timegate, as the overlord offered to share the load with Time, albeit limited. Time supervises the Earth's time for roughly 47 hours per day, whilst Lionel supervises 13 hours. Time is also friends with Darren.

Time was born in the year ∞ BCE in the centre of the universe and waited until the Earth was formed so he could be the existence progression manager of it. Until Timegate, he was worshipped by many cultures, both ancient and modern. Since the incident, he has been a topic of great debate and many have split views on his reliability.

Appearances in the books
As a concept, Time has appeared in all of the Norman McFinger books. As a character, he exclusively appears in Norman McFinger III: Revenge of the Finger, where he plays a central role in the first chapter. He is introduced by Norman after radiation poisoning leaks in his kitchen and the protagonist is describing the danger as a "matter of time" before somebody is poisoned. He then attends Darren's millionaire party, where he is first named with a capitalised T."'It was only a matter of time before somebody got radiation poisoning from the radiation poisoning leaking from my radiation poisoning microwave.""But time’s shift was up. His hours were from 1 PM to 54 o’clock, and it was 58 o’clock, so he wasn’t working. I realised how sexist I was, just assuming that time was male. He could have been an email but no, I naturally assumed he was a male. But then I looked down time’s trousers and saw the truth. I wasn’t sexist, I was just a genius. So since time’s shift was up, it was not a matter of time’s, but instead Lionel’s.'""'[Darren] invited her friends Lionel and Time and they partied all night long. Time had the amazing idea to hire strippers and a fruit caterer.'"